How about renaming it "Brad Pit Bull"?

Recently we were tapped to work on a highly controversial project... to rebrand America's most demonized breed of canine, the Pit Bull.

All of us here at Eat My Words are dyed-in-the-sheep wool animal lovers with many dogs, cats, goats, chickens, Chia pets, Pet Rocks, and one very angry goose sharing their lives with us. (Not in a one-bedroom apartment, thank godness.) Therefore, we are predisposed to love our furry and feathered friends.

However, we admit to buying into some of the myths and misstatements about the Pit Bull and committed ourselves to get educated about this proud beast, which was once known as "Americas family pet."

Our preliminary research has resulted in the following positive findings:

• Petey (a Pit Bull) ran with The Little Rascals and they all lived to adulthood.

• Jessica Biel and Jessica Alba both own Pit Bulls, and they are hot so whatever they like we like.

• There was a Pit Bull named Grunt in the movie "Flashdance". The story is that not only was Grunt a wonderful dog, but is widely considered to be a better actor than Jennifer Beals

• Cesar Millan says they are OK and he is the Dog Whisperer. We don't know what the hell whispering to a dog does, but Cesar has his own show and nice teeth.

• Contrary to popular belief, Pit Bulls do not have a "locking jaw" mechanism. The same cannot be said for Rumer Willis.

• The Pit Bull Registry claims you are more four times more likely to be killed by a cow than a Pit Bull. Two questions. 1) who keeps track of bovine related deaths 2) how embarrassing would it be to be killed by a cow? How about a "roaring cow"?

All kidding aside, we have learned a lot of positive things about Pit Bulls and have changed our views. Pit Bulls have only gotten a bad rap because of their association with dog fighting and popularity with MTV gangstas. The good news is that the gangsta thugs we have spotted lately in the hood are all sporting itty bitty Chihuahuas ala Paris Hilton.

Like the breed, the new names needs to be friendly and approachable. Our 5 favorite new names so far:

Rockwell Terrier
(ala Norman Rockwell)

American Spirit Terrier
(Americana, sounds like a top breed)

Emperor Terrier
(a Pit Bull type dog was given to a Chinese emperor)

Gettysburg Terrier
(Americana)

Relay Terrier
(they exceed in flyball which involves relays)

We'll keep you posted...

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*Pit Bull is not a breed but a description of several dogs with similar characteristics including the American Pit Bull Terrier, American Staffordshire Terrier, Staffordshire Bull Terrier and Sarah Palin.

Literally Eating My Words at Spoon Me

In town for Spoon Me founder Ryan Combe's wedding over the weekend (see next post), thanks to the GPS in my rental car, I managed to hit two Spoon Me locations (and eat Spoon Me at the wedding) in less than 8 hours. Spoon Me is the name that Eat My Words is the most proud of creating. Ryan and his partners David and Wayne have built a cult brand that transcends frozen yogurt and has become one of the hottest franchises on the planet, with projections of 100 new stores within the next 18 months. Spoon Me is a stellar example of how a brand can take a name and run with it. (That's why we call them names with "legs".) From the best-selling "Shut Up and Spoon Me" t-shirts to the "No Spooning on Sundays" hours sign, to the Spoon Me movie quote graffiti ("You had me at Spoon Me") in the bathrooms, there are endless ways to extend the brand through wordplay. Here are photos from my afternoon visit to the original store in Salt Lake City and my late night visit to one of the new super mod locations in Sandy, Utah. Thanks to everyone at Spoon Me for treating me like a celebrity. Can't wait to come back!

Wha'chu talkin' 'bout, Willis?

The Sears Tower, America's tallest building, is being renamed The Willis Tower as a result of a major new tenant, Willis Group Holdings. That's it. We just could not resist the post title.

Radisson Blu It

We are all for name changes. In fact we encourage it, in many cases. However, this one from Radisson is odd. First take a look at this from their website:

"As time goes by, your much loved Radisson SAS Hotels & Resorts will change their name to Radisson Blu. This is not a revolution but a gentle evolution. A small graphical change that is significant only in that it reflects a corporate transaction of a few years ago that brought about the natural end of Radisson's links with the SAS Group.

Our values remain the same, our beliefs are the same, our ambitions are the same, our people are the same, our hotels are the same, and our Blu box that allows us to stand out from the global Radisson crowd, remains the same. The world's favourite colour will soon come to represent a cool, calm and collective Radisson hotel experience. The more things change, the more they stay the same. Radisson Blu, you'll soon forget it was ever known as anything else."

If that isn't clear, Gordon McKinnon vice-president of branding explains: “Our customers are used to a difference between Radisson SAS and simply Radisson and we wanted to keep that differentiation there by using “Blu” in the title, in reference to the previous use of a blue box in the logo.” He also said he hoped the rebrand would win more customers.

What?

Let's suspend reality for a moment and say that that makes sense. OK, why BLU and not BLUE or even BLEU for that European flair? It just looks like someone forgot to type the "e".

P.S. Hey cybersquatters!

NameTag®, You’re Not It

We are always amused by our competitors when they glorify their naming processes as “proprietary” methodology and come up with mumbo jumbo voodoo jive to describe what’s behind the curtain. Sometimes all that behind the curtain is empty space. Let us say it again:

Everyone names things the same way, but some just do it better than others. When you can stand by your names proudly, you don’t need falderal to sell your names.

Which brings us to worldwide brand strategy, naming firm and falderal experts, NameTag® International, Inc.

( who claims their names are…)

Here is their International mumbo jumbo voodoo jive:

“Our proprietary Idiotics™ Ideonics™ process encompasses BrandVision™, strategic ideation, trademark assessment, brand testing and brand rollout assistance.”

Falderal to English translation:

Our process, that is like everyone else’s, involves thinking up names, checking for conflicts, testing it and stuff then pretend that we came up with great names (although we won’t tell you that part). Then, in our downtime, we sit around and think up junk like Ideonics™, BrandVision™ and:

InSight Research, which breaks down into four distinct options for your brand research needs:

· 4Sight™ provides our clients with rapid market indicators of the viability of their brand name.

· EquiTest™ measures the brand equity of an existing name.

· WorldTest™ serves as an international brand inference testing procedure providing a preliminary, global linguistic analysis in languages specified by the client.

· VeriTest™ addresses global research and is designed to assist clients with name assessment and final name candidate viability

Yikes. Nothing new there.

Here is what you get with Ideonics™ et al ; Everything from Amazara to Zintrepid, with STŌK, Sorian, Aerius, Cognis and Teligen in between.

They say:

We Say:

Eat My Words creates truly unforgettable names like Spoon Me frozen yogurt, Cake Financial, Frigid ice cream, BackBeat ear buds and iPod clock radio we named Moondance. We can do the same for you….and we promise never to say falderal ever again.

Tasty Tidbits from the past week...

Sometimes we find juicy news not worthy of a full blog post, yet too darn good to not share with you. These "Tasty Tidbits" are digestible bites of news about new names and the naming industry and what we think of them here at Eat My Words. Bon Appetit!

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Scary name for new roller coaster - The North Carolina State Fair's newest roller coaster has been named "Toxic Shock," as a result of a naming contest. We are not big fans of naming contests and this is just another example of you get what you pay for. We are not sure of the connection between a roller coaster and a rare, life-threatening bacterial infection that has been most often associated with the use of superabsorbent tampons and occasionally with the use of contraceptive sponges. However, it is better than the two runner-up names, Irritable Bowel Syndrome and Necrotizing fasciitis.

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Death Doesn't Sell - There is a movement afoot in Israel to change the name of The Dead Sea because as one business owner says "our clients from abroad are uncomfortable buying products that have originated in a place whose name is associated with death. It's problematic." They have not offered any alternatives, but we think any change to such a historical name with eons of brand equity and a rich reputation for its health benefits would be misplaced and would undoubtedly end up sounding silly.

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Company wins rights to sewage facility - T. Wayne Hill Trucking, a bio-solids (nice word for you know what) management company, had the winning bid of $6,100 out of 26 bids on eBay for the naming rights to a school's new sewage plant. We can't wait for the sign. The company logo is of a smiley face holding it's nose. We think it was a brilliant marketing move.

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We bet the real "Joe the Plumber" is getting a lot of hits on his website.

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Father names baby without mother's consent, may be dumbest man ever.

Here it is...Sarah McCain Palin. The father, Mark Citpak, did it "to get the word out" about the campaign. He goes on to say, "I took one for the cause, I can't give a lot of financial support for the (McCain/Palin) campaign. I do have a sign up in my yard, but I can do very little." Finally, in a statement that will seal his fate “I sort of secretively went behind her back and changed the paperwork.”

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Here is the Namethis.com lame name of the week:

This week we have another tie:

For "a mobile application and associated web site for quickly sharing your life with friends. Initially this will be sharing photos ."

The winner is Manifestivity.com The client has not snapped this winner up as of 11:15AM 10-19-08

For "a free service where you can find, share, and store recommendations easily and privately with the people you trust- See instantly what your friends have already recommended (no more wading through past emails to find stuff)"

**preference for domain names that are short, can’t be misspelled, random words that don’t mean anything are ok too

The winner is Ourpinionis.com. The client has not snapped this winner up as of 11:15AM 10-17-08

Prior week's winners, Pixelouvre.com, Mevolutionfitness.com and Communinnty.com are all also still available.

So this crowdsourcing thing is not really working out for their clients. If these names are indicative of the ones rising to the top, there is something definitely broken in their methodology. At least that ourpinionis.

Frigid, Mixin' Vixens Stuff a Sock In It

If you guessed that Frigid, Mixin' Vixens, and Stuff a Sock In It are all cool brand names created by Eat My Words, congratulations! Bonus points if you figured out that Frigid is the name of a gourmet ice cream store, Mixin' Vixens is an all-women bartender service, and Stuff a Sock In It is a laundromat. When you see or hear an "Eat My Words name," you'll never ask what it means, how to pronounce it, or "What were they smoking?!" Our super-likable names make powerful emotional connections, build instant brand affinity, and make our clients rich. Yes, rich. We are the only naming firm that monetizes names. For instance, we turned the name Frigid into cold hard cash for our client by creating a t-shirt for them that says, "Not tonight dear, I have an ice cream headache." Ca-ching! Our Stuff a Sock In It client will be slapping their new logo on laundry bags, t-shirts, and other merchandise geared at their college kid customers. Ca-ching!

Of course, the client who is monetizing the bejesus out of their Eat My Words name is Spoon Me, the frozen yogurt store that is one of the hottest franchises in the country. They are selling Spoon Me pajamas, booty shorts, underwear, baby clothes, stickers, buttons and of course t-shirts with slogans we created like "Shut Up and Spoon Me." Ca-ching! Ca-ching! Ca-ching!

Would someone buy a t-shirt with your company or product name on it and pay you to advertise your brand? To see if your name has potential, take the Eat My Words SMILE & SCRATCH Test, which was recently featured in The Wall Street Journal.

Tasty Tidbits from the past week...

Sometimes we find juicy news not worthy of a full blog post, yet too darn good to not share with you. These "Tasty Tidbits" are digestible bites of news about new names and what we think of them here at Eat My Words. Bon Appetit!

________________________________________

In the company most in the need of an immediate name change department is the Viet Nam based airline company "Air Speed Up". It turns out that the name in Vietnamese means "Death and Grief."

____________________________________________________________________________

We think it is not a wise move to name a children's product something that implies child abuse. Apparently the "PopATot" people don't have such qualms.

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The name change explanation of the week comes from SaleBuild, who changed their name to Salesify.

Here, is their own words, is the impetus behind the name change:

The Company's former sales-centric services have been significantly expanded to include marketing processes and the name, Salesify, reflects this strategic repositioning.

The Salesify name is also aspirational, and while grounded in more than 30 years of industry experience, points towards our dynamic, innovative and out-of-the box thinking," continued (company CFO, Oliver) Deng.

Um, what? Did they that name from Namethis.com?

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drank is the past tense drink that comes to us promising us that it will "Slow your roll" with a combination of valerian root, melatonin and rose hips. We are getting sleepy already.

The problem is that drank is a slang term for a homemade cocktail consisting of Sprite soda and prescription strength Promethazine/Codeine Cough Syrup. Good idea.....really. We think their next product should be an energy drink called Speedball.

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Our favorite book title of the week is:

Momma Is Daddy Going to Hell?

From the book description we get:

Captivated by the sermons on Hell at his mother's church, Little Johnny started to question his mother about the great abyss. His curiosity covers topics such as the fate of his adulterous father, celebrities, false teachers and different religions to name a few. (our emphasis)

We think this is less about Little Johnny's curiosity and everything about his adulterous father. The book title we think is not a question, but a hoped for fate for Little Johnny's adulterous daddy by Little Johnny's momma.

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We hope we didn't spoil your dinner.

Alexandra sheds some Light on naming in Smart Money

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Asked & Answered: Marketing Multiple Businesses
June 24, 2008

By Colleen DeBaise

QUESTION: Your Oct. 30, 2007, article described people who run multiple businesses. My problem is a little different. I am a freelance writer offering business- and career-writing services. Last year, I also started a direct-sales business (selling health and wellness products). How do I incorporate the range of services I offer under one umbrella and market it in a way that is cost-effective, but not confusing to the client? What business name should I consider? —Gloria Brown, Menifee, Calif.

ANSWER: Essentially, you want to be a one-woman conglomerate, tying together seemingly unrelated businesses into one neat package. Even big-name companies with lots of marketing muscle (think Altria (MO), Time Warner (TWX) and Tyco (TYC)) have run into trouble doing this successfully at times.

As a small-business owner with limited resources, you'll face even more challenges. The biggest hurdle? Explaining to potential customers what it is, exactly, that you're selling. "To get momentum, you really have to narrow your message, so someone says 'Oh, I get that, you're talking to me,'" says John Jantsch, a marketing coach and founder of Duct Tape Marketing in Kansas City, Mo. "When you start adding things on, it starts getting hard to explain to people what you do."

Of course, many entrepreneurs tack on a new line of products or services to complement an existing business — and, in some cases, that works well. For instance, a popular restaurant might open up a kitchen store that sells appliances, cookbooks and food items that would logically appeal to its customer base. But when the two businesses are dissimilar, it's the "classic sushi bar and bait shop" scenario, Jantsch says. "That's always going to be a challenge."

Some entrepreneurs dig deep to find a link. When Cindy Light wanted to combine her two services — she's a fashion consultant, plus an expert on Chinese business etiquette — she turned to a business-name expert for help. Alexandra Watkins, founder of Eat My Words, a San Francisco firm that specializes in memorable names, reasoned that both services help make Light's clients look like superstars, both personally and professionally. So she suggested that Light use her evocative last name to tie the services together. Light has since named the business Cindy Light and plans to use the tagline "Making you shine" in her marketing materials.

Unfortunately, in your case, there appear to be too few links between your professional-writing services and your direct-sales business. "I can't imagine a way to combine these two together, and for it not to be confusing," Watkins says. As many conglomerates have found, trying to operate unrelated businesses under one big heading can lead to customer confusion — and make it difficult to focus resources and manage the company effectively. For the time being, you might try building both businesses separately, and if it's too draining on your time, energy and bottom line to do both, "then just make a determination which one you really think has the best potential," Jantsch advises.

Got a question? Send us an email at Editors@smSmallBiz.com. Due to the volume of questions we receive, we are not able to answer all questions. Questions that are selected for publication may be edited for length and clarity.

Taco Bell Gets Jiggy With It - Find Your Rap Name, Flyboy

In a strange and very very square attempt to get some ink, Taco Bell has " challenged" 50Cent to change his name to, wait for it.......79, 89 or 99Cent, which is the cost on the new Taco Bell fine dining "Why Pay More" value menu (without a question mark, BTW).. Riiiiight. 50Cent is not amused.

Oh, but the squareness gets worse. You can go to this website and find the " Why Pay Mo' " (yes, they said Mo') Rhyme Generator, get your own "Rap Name", created by giving your first name, favorite Taco Bell Treat, and identifying yourself as (OMG) a ("homeboy" or "flygirl"). Geez, could they be whiter? For the record our "rap name" is E-NOR-MOUS M. Taste.

We think Taco Bell thought too far outside the bun here.

In case other companies want to try this, we have some suggestions:

Current Name	Possible New Name
Black Eyed Peas	Birdseye Peas
Blackalicious	Bubblicious
Dr Dre	Dr Pepper
Eve	Summer's Eve
Jay Z	La-Z Boy
LL Cool J	LL Cool Whip
Salt-N-Pepa	Salt-N-Pep Boys
Wu Tang Clan	Wu Orange Tang Clan
E-40	WD-40
Yo Yo	Yo Yoplait

Alexandra featured speaker at City Club of SF "Secrets of Success" series

Next Tuesday afternoon. Alexandra will be the featured speaker at the City Club of San Francisco for their "Secrets of Success" series. She was invited to talk there after someone on the board heard her speak on how she broke into the naming business through some quick thinking on a Match.com date. Alexandra will be telling this hysterical story and many others (writing letters to prisoners in high school, launching the first line of retro greeting cards with Paper Moon Graphics, a juicy story of poetic justice for a boss who fired her 23 years ago, and more). Below is the copy from the announcement that the City Club sent out...

Alexandra Watkins is the creative visionary behind Eat My Words, an innovative naming firm known for developing brand names that generate buzz and revenue. While she started out specializing in things that make people fat and drunk, her clients quickly discovered that she also had a talent for naming things you don't put in your mouth. Since then, her firm has generated countless evocative names and taglines for clients including Frito-Lay, Altec-Lansing, Guthy-Renker, Glu, THX, Clorox, The Sydney Opera House, Del Monte, and Stanford University. Her recent successes include a chain of frozen yogurt stores called Spoon Me, a home cleaning robot named Neato, a social networking site for investors called Cake Financial, and a nationally-advertised bacon cheeseburger, which ironically must remain nameless. (Hint: it was inspired by a Schwarzenegger movie.)

Throughout her colorful 20+ year career in branding and advertising, Alexandra, whose education includes an entire semester of community college, has used her unabashed creativity, charm, and fearless attitude to open doors, scale walls, and create endless business opportunities for herself. Her highly entertaining stories of success and perseverance will inspire you to tap into your own creativity and try bold and unexpected approaches to any personal or professional challenge you face.

$35 for members/$45 for non-members

San Francisco City Club
155 Sansome Street
The Stock Exchange Tower
San Francisco, California 94104

RSVP to 415.362.2480 or reservations@cityclubsf.com

How your name can generate buzz and bacon

In today's freaky economy, advertising budgets are facing extinction and marketing dollars are being stretched like carnival taffy. Your name has to do more, say more, and work harder than ever before. Without a massive ad campaign to drill it in (think: Head On), consumers cannot remember brand names that are tame, tired, copycat, spelling-challenged, or have hidden meanings. Now more than ever, it's critical that your name is memorable, meaningful, sticky, has legs, speaks volumes, and can pay for itself. You know you have a winning name with ROI when it...

Generates buzz without spending advertising dollars

Is instantly likeable, creating affinity for your brand

Has strong differentiation for brand-recognition

Emotionally connects with your target, inspiring loyalty

Stays fresh and vibrant, never becomes dated

Positions you as a trendsetter, increasing your credibility

Is rich in wordplay, allowing for brand extensions while retaining the name's original charm

Can be monetized through merchandise & licensing, with people paying you to advertise your brand

Learn more about how a powerful name can cut the fat and bring home the bacon.

This BS Brand Didn't Bear Up

Our friends at Cake Financial (a company that Eat My Words named), have a post on their dishy blog concerning the recent bad news about Bear Stearns. (While on the subject, we are enjoying "The Slice", Cake Financial's weekly market summary video starring Steve and Sven that is funny and destined for Internet immortality.) The Bear Stearns financial fallout resulted in a reduction in market cap from the 52 week high of $21.7 billion on April 25, 2007, to a low of $386 million on March 17, 2008 .

What ultimately will happen with the firm started by Joseph Bear and Robert Stearns in 1923 is not yet clear, but it is safe to say it will not ever recapture it's prominent position on wall street, it's market value, or (the ultimate point of this post), it's brand value.

As recently as the third quarter of 2007, Corebrand ranked Bear Stearns #429 in it's regular BrandPower Rankings ( Between US Bancorpand Deutsche Bank, to put it in perspective). According to Corebrand, BrandPower is "a single-score measure of the size and quality (familiarity and favorability) of a company’s reputation. It’s a measure of brand equity presented in both historical and competitive context. "

Our guess is that it will most likely (O.K., for sure) drop off the list altogether next time CoreBrand does their rankings.

While this is an extreme example, a significant portion of the aforementioned market cap freefall can be attributed to the intangible value of Bear Stearns which includes its "brand".

Perhaps Bear Stearns will take the time honored path of changing its name to distance itself from its own past, or just quietly fold into the paternal hands of its savior, JP Morgan. If you want to change your name and rebuild a new brand, Bear Stearns, we're here for you. Eat My Words specializes in creating names that score immediate (to use CoreBrand's words) familiarity and favorability. We're all about helping a company build its brand from the start with a name that creates buzz, which creates publicity, which creates business, which creates revenue, which creates brand value.

To put it mathematically:

EMW = ROI